Are You Turning Into The World’s Biggest Liar By Being Overly Optimistic

17 Comments Posted in Personal Development

overly-optimistic
Image courtesy of visbeek

It is good to be optimistic as it can keep our spirit up and optimistic people tend to achieve what they want to achieve. Isn’t that true? Yes, that is what the experts or everyone is saying. But how true is this theory that being optimistic is beneficial to us?

Let us take a look at The Secret. The theory of The Secret is that you will need to keep thinking about what you want in order to attract it to your life. So naturally this means that you will need to be optimistic and think only about the positive. I am not saying that being positive is a wrong thing to do but I am questioning whether it is the best approach?

I had seen people who embrace the theory of being optimistic in every situation and it does well for them because they feel happier at that very moment. But it seems like to be that they are being blinded by their optimism that they lose their perception of reality. They drift to the future and lost sense of what is right in front of them now.

Let us take a look at an example. Let’s say John has a goal and his goal is to achieve financial freedom. But his situation right now is not favourable. He is working in a 12 hours a day job and earning $1500 per month. He decided to adopt the optimistic approach, be optimistic, think positive and hoping that things will get better.

Optimist Approach VS Realist Approach

How many of you believe that staying optimistic is going to help John achieve financial freedom? Yes, The Secret says so that staying optimistic and thinking positive will attract the scenarios to help him get his dream job and earn $100,000 per year. But I am sure that this approach will not work out well.

To be fair to The Secret, I got to agree that staying optimistic to a certain extent does help to keep the mind sane. But this approach isn’t really the best way to achieve what you want in life. So what if John takes another approach instead? – The Realist Approach.

John has a goal to achieve financial freedom and he is stuck in his day 12 hours day job earning $1500 per month. He chose to be aware of his current situation. He knows that what he is doing now is not going to get him to where he want to be. The reality, the harsh facts and true numbers are staring in his face. He want to change and he knows that he is not optimistic about his current situation and in fact, he felt pessimistic about his future if things are going to continue the way it is. This is the point where he decided to change because is aware of his present situation.

Which approach do you think is the better one? The optimistic approach where John just stays optimistic and think positive or the realist approach where John is aware of the truth right now and decided that he needs to fix it in order to move on?

Just staying positive and overly optimistic puts you into a self denial mode and eventually you will become the world’s biggest liar by lying to yourself everyday. You lose your sense of reality (exp:not earning enough money now) and escape to the future(exp:financial freedom). This is not a very smart thing to do because if you do not fix your problems of today, the problem will still be there tomorrow. The problem doesn’t go away if all you do is to be optimistic of the future and stay ignorant of the problem staring at you now.

Parting Words

What I want to reinforce here is that you will need to avoid letting optimism take over your sense of reality. If you are unhealthy, broke or unhappy, it is a problem that you need to fix now. Don’t hold on to the thought that things will be better tomorrow when you are not taking any action to fix it. If nothing had been done, things are going to stay the same way! What do you think? Do you think the realist approach or the optimist approach works better? I’m open to ideas and I look forward to your comments below.

Cheers,
Vincent


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17 Responses to “Are You Turning Into The World’s Biggest Liar By Being Overly Optimistic”

  1. Chris says:

    no, this article is spot-on. positive thinking = lying everyday. it really doesnt change anything but your attitude towards the current situation. you cannot say that having positive thoughts only creates positive experiences, because positive things happen to negative people…just like negative things happen to positive people.

    for example:

    *Ohio Woman Celebrates Lottery Win, Then Killed by Car
    http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,584108,00.html?test=latestnews

    the woman won the lottery, then gets killed by a car the same day… why god? was she not positive enough?

    *being overly optimistic or “only seeing abundance” does indeed mean lying to yourself everyday. “the secret” does indeed turn people into habitual and pathological liars, and also when others ask “so where are all of your manifestations?” you have to lie again.

    *its all about selective lying. there is no scientific evidence that says this type of lying will change a persons physical reality in any way, shape or form…but there are testimonials from people who cant explain why it works for them every time… but then again they could just be lying.

    *there definitely is harm in being overly optimistic, take a look at the stock market and current economic crisis…all due to optimism.

    *you cant just “imagine an abundance of jobs” when you already know that jobs dont exist. you have to lie about the abundance, and lie about what is actually in front of you. thats just what it is

    in order to be a follower of the “law of attraction” or of “the secret” you need to become a very good liar and storyteller – so good that you begin to believe your own lies, and then you will start acting in a certain way and doing things that will habitually attract you to certain people, places and events.

  2. Devin says:

    I think you got the idea of the secret all wrong dude… but I can’t blame you the movie doesn’t do the best job explaining.
    The law of attraction is not about mindless positive thinking. It’s about aligning your thoughts with what you want then acting as much as possible to bring it into your life.
    Think about jack canfields story of how he got rich. He aligned himself with what he wanted, but then he still had to act on all the ideas and opportunities that presented themselves to him before he made it big, its just when he aligned himself and thought positively towards it he manifested ideas and opportunities to help guide him. Thinking positively and being an optimist does not mean denying reality. it means accepting your current reality, and then aligning yourself with the new reality you want to create and then working towards it. In no way does it say bury your head in the sand and deny whats true… you just bring your focus from resiting and stressing over what is, trapped in your situation, to working towards your new situation with positive energy and motivation. You acknowledge your problems then focus on the solutions. Believing you can overcome something will bring into your reality ways to overcome it… Check out the believing is seeing article on my site!

    • Vincent says:

      Hi Devin,

      I get what you mean and I’m trying to bring attention to people who thought that just pure positive thinking will help them to create the success that they want. Anyway I love your detailed comment and thanks for sharing with us. 🙂

      Cheers,
      Vincent

  3. Interesting article. It is the exact opposite of my last article. I have studied Law of Attraction immensely, so I understand it much more than what you’d learn by watching the hype in the Secret.

    With that said, I believe that the only limits are those you allow to exist in your mind. Most people prefer to be realistic because it is safe. It is reasonable. It is what you know. It looks certain. However, people who achieve greatness are usually those who have a poorly developed sense of realism & limitation.

    Law of Attraction is much more than being optimistic. It is about changing who you are at the core, which isn’t an overnight process. Changing your belief system is very different than lying to yourself everyday. When you can truly get to the bottom of your limiting beliefs about a subject, about yourself, or about life in general—you can create magic.

  4. when i was a kid I would play this strategy game called red alert. I started out getting minced everytime I started playing a game, and it got quite frustrating. But after a while I started to win victories. The tougher the scenario the more excited I became at the thought of overcoming it.

    So perhaps it is not the optimism we should embrace, but the excitement of challenges. I wrote a post on management of life areas inspired by T.R. (Tony Robbins). I simplified it a little bit anyway:

    1. Complacency & dissapointment – into frustration
    2. Frustration – into fascination
    3. Fascination – into energy
    4. Energy – into momentum

    Lindsay

  5. Vincent says:

    Hi Oscar,

    You are right buddy. 🙂

    Hi Diggy,

    Action is crucial but it is sad to see so many people ignoring this simple advice.

    Hi Jen,

    I believe positive thinking alone is just like trying to clap with a single hand. It takes 2 hand to clap and action is needed to go with positive thinking to make things work.

    Hi Bob,

    Thanks for sharing the story with us. It is a great illustration to show us that positive thinking alone will not get us anywhere.

    Hi Javier,

    I totally agree with you. Nothing is going to be done with just positive thinking. Awareness of reality and being able to take action will help us to achieve more things instead.

    Hi Faye,

    It is great to be positive but do not allow it to mask the reality.

    Hi Adam,

    “Optimism + No action = No results” This formula said it all. 🙂

    Cheers,
    Vincent

  6. Briefcases says:

    I agree that we should limit our optimism. It definitely can blind you from reality when you are always assuming things will work out. Eventually you have to accept reality and work at actually changing things.

  7. Adam says:

    “What do you think? Do you think the realist approach or the optimist approach works better?” – I would say optimism today is fine, as long as you’re taking some kind of action to improve your situation today as well. Otherwise optimism + no action = no results.

  8. Faye says:

    Great post I am always trying to be positive.

  9. Javier Chua says:

    Cool. Thinking positive is important but taking actions to get things done in order to reach to the destination we want to achieve is the key to our success door. Everything and everyone has its good and bad so it really depends on how people make use of the situation to create their future.

  10. Bob Bessette says:

    Well put! This post reminds me of something that Anthony Robbins once said. The optimist will say “There are no weeds in my garden. There are no weeds in my garden.” and as a result the weeds will take over the garden. Positivity should not mask reality…

    Best,
    Bob

  11. Jen says:

    Great post Vincent – this is something I have pondered too. I think a good context /attitude and corresponding actions is the key to achieving any goal. Too much work with the wrong attitude or positive thinking alone doesn’t get you very far.

  12. Hey Vincent!

    The definition of insanity is doing something the same way over and over and expecting different results.

    Dreaming and positive thinking alone will not make a big change, but might allow for an opportunity for you to take action (by meeting someone or doing something you usually would not do). Taking action is of course crucial to change.

    Keep well 🙂
    Diggy

  13. Great article, being too much optimistic it’s not good, but as you said if we combine it with reality we can achieve great things.